Waiting for the Words

Radiation was to begin tomorrow and as I lay awake trying to get to sleep, I couldn’t help but feel overwhelmed with fear and doubt about what I was about to put my body through. Although surgery was already behind me and this was the next step, I wasn’t ready! I could forego radiation, but my chances of living a cancer-free life were increased if I proceeded with this next step. Yet I struggled with the the thought of destroying good cells to get to any remaining cancer cells, not to mention the list of possible side effects I had been made well aware of. These healthy cells would be sacrificed in order to destroy any cancerous ones, giving me a better chance of survival!

It was then I realized: God made that decision when He sent us His Son; He was sacrificed for us! Again, the words I was waiting for. It’s as if he was saying it’s okay. No need to worry; I am in control. God did this for me! He sacrificed His son for me! He would give me the strength to withstand anything I needed to face. It was necessary for my healthy cells to be destroyed along with the cancerous ones so that my body could be healed of this relentless disease!

I then felt a peace about the next step of the journey before me. I could rest assured knowing that I was in good hands, that I wasn’t in this alone, and that I was making the right decision. God was in control! I was ready for tomorrow, and I finally drifted off to sleep.

Fast forward two weeks, and I am halfway through my radiation treatments. I am confident it was the right decision. I am staying positive and strong and even though there are some painful side effects, I am fortunate. I know that whatever lies ahead, my faith, family and friends will be there to pull me through! For that, I am so very grateful! God is good!

Until next time, think about all the beautiful sacrifices that have been made for you and all the sacrifices you have made for others!

Michelle